A beautiful day in San Diego brought a my continued gratitude for living in this city.I met a friend for brunch in one of my favorite little haunts in Hillcrest. We dined and chatted and watched the people go by. We walked around the district for a while afterwards, window and real shopping. I got my french magazine and she her book of civil rights poetry. I ducked into a furniture store that housed many items that peaked my desire. I left empty handed but full of ideas for my little condo.
We strolled back to the car and I decided that I would drop her off at her home rather than letting her catch the bus... This seemingly small, generous decision brought much more than I expected. As i said, my plan was to drop her off and head home to start my weekend cleaning.
I know now that she must trust our friendship, because inviting me into her home was a risk taking move. How can you determine how someone would react?
She opened the front door, and as quickly as my mouth dropped open in complete shock, I knew I had to pick it back up and pull myself together. Her home was filled, from floor to ceiling with ...stuff. New stuff, old stuff, junky stuff, good stuff.. but there was no space for living. it was like walking into an episode of Oprah. "Today, on the Oprah show, how clutter gets out of control and what you can do about it". But there was no Oprah, no cameras, no help from her team of experts. It was just me... my friend, and literally mountains of things.
There was no place to sit and only a narrow pathway carved throughout the dwelling that took you from one room to the next. Even the stairs were congested with shoes, papers, picture frames, you name it... so you had to stay close to the banister (which was alright with me). The voice in my head was screaming to get out.... seek freedom from this maze of madness. But my conscience told me to be patient and don't judge.. be a friend. I opted for the latter and it proved quite difficult...
I managed to pretend that everything was normal.. that, sure...lots of people live like this. Her kitchen was filled with dishes in both sides of the sink, every counter top was covered with dishes, boxes, towels..... I could not imagine how she maneuvers each day to get dressed and come to work. She is clean and smart and one would never suspect that there were any underlying issues. But they are there... deep seated and overwhelming. What can one person do at this point?
Jut try to be a friend and recognize if there are calls for help....
Needed so very badly. Though the company I am keeping is poor at best, the surroundings are beautiful, the people friendly, sun warm and calming. I am excited to actually be taking time from work (and not working) to spend leisurely on the beach, by the pool..drinking margaritas and watching my skin darken in the chlorinated and salt waters that I stay immersed in.
